Time

Why is it that when you're with or around people, the concept of time seems almost nonexistent with the way it flies by.? Its as if its a junkie hopped on speed and rushes ahead to get its next fix. And why is it that when your alone and by yourself time seems to stop completely? Like that same junkie coming down from their high. The real question is why does this happen? In reality, you want to spend th most time with people when you're with them, and when you're alone, you want time to pass as quickly as possible.
Believe me when I tell you, that this is not the case. Sitting home on a Friday night is torture. My friends are gone and I am left with nothing to do other than sit around watching pirated movies and tv shows off the internet. The thing that further adds to the air being pathetic is that Ive looked into hobbies to fill my time and I couldn't even find something that interests me. How pathetic i it that an 18 college student cant find anything that interests him? Extremely pathetic is the answer. So as I sit here now, I acknowledge time as nothing other than a twisted junkie that has no purpose other than torturing people by taking away moments of enjoyment, and then forcing them to endure moments of boredom and lonesomeness. So to time, I say, "Fuck You."

Signing Out
-Brian-

Song In My Head...

Oh I don't believe it,
That I could be so deceiving
And bringing you down to feel this lack of loyalty.


So I guess an apology is in line for my recently departed friends. Since you've left, I don't know what to do with myself, and I know I've been coming off as a major jerk, and I'm sorry for that. I guess its just harder for me to get used to you not being here whenever i need you, or you need me, and I guess a part of me is slightly jealous. You got out of this small, dead end town and I'm still here, and it terrifies me that I might never get out of here. But at the same time I envy the fact that you got out, and were able to adjust so quickly and efficiently, which leads me to the fear of getting left behind in your life, and never having what we had this past summer again. But I wish you luck in your college bound lives and I hope that at some point ill be able to catch up and hopefully you'll still recognize me.

Singing out
-Brian-